Sports Platitudes That Need to Go

Posted: May 21, 2012 in Bunker, Just Throwing This Out There
Tags: , ,

“Vaunted” (usually used when referring to a great defense): The actual meaning of vaunted is boast about or praise (something), esp. excessively, but every time a defense is above average some unimaginative sports writer throws vaunted in there to supposedly provide some emphasis for their statement

“High-Powered” (usu. used when describing a great offense): How does that not make you cringe? Does it even sound right to say out-loud?

“Prolific” –  Always used when discussing a quarterback or an offense. Never a prolific defense. I think it’s only because announcers and pundits are obsessed with alliteration and prolific passer always sounds better than anything else.

“He Just Loves Playing the Game”: Really?

“He’s a Winner”: So what happens on the days they lose? What are they now?

“Triumphant Return”: There is no such thing as a triumphant return in the middle of the season. Now this is a triumphant return.

“Defense Wins Championship”: Offense wins championships. You have to score to win. Unless your defense is scoring, this doesn’t make much sense. I know, I know. Good defenses put your team in a great position to win, but just look at the last five or six champions in every sport. Was it good pitching or good hitting? Was it more quarterbacks or linebackers that made the difference? Just saying. Out-dated.

“______s of the world”: I heard this the other day on NFL 52. “When you have the Drew Brees’, Tom Bradys and Aaron Rodgers of the world you always have a chance to win it all.” Why can’t you just say when you have an elite quarterback, you have a chance to win it all. The only time this is applicable is when there is someone who shares the same quality with the same name. Other wise it’s stupid. Just plain dumb. Although it’s not limited to only sports, this needs to go.

“He Just Wins Games” (also see: He’s Just a Winner): See Tim Tebow.

“He’s a Great Locker Room Guy: Every time this is said, the announcer/writer/pundit describes the player as if he’s 1/3 athlete, 1/3 cheerleader, 1/3 therapist. No one in sports has ever been signed because he makes all the players feel better about themselves.

“He Just Makes Plays”: Almost at every point of a game a play is made. You can make a play on the ball and miss. You can scored a touchdown and play is made. You can turn the ball over and that’s a play. Someone just made a play on you. Making a play goes both ways. Brett Favre made a lot of plays, many of them went into the hands of other players.

“We got back to playing our game” – As opposed to? This is just another way of saying, we actually executed our game plan. More simply, we played well or better.

“He does all the little things right” – The guy in basketball who does everything but score. The guy who has no specialty that you don’t want playing too long. You want to know why this is barely used in football, because they have one or two things they need to do well and if they don’t, they just don’t play.

“He’s scrappy” – Another way of saying a guy lacks athleticism or quite frankly is white.

“We’ve got to take the next step (level)” – Another way of saying “let’s do better”.

Any references to God after victories – God (depending on what side of the faith you are) does a lot of things. Picking winners for games is not one of them.

Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty

“Gotta give it our all” – Giving your all means death.

“Gotta leave it all on the floor”  – See above.

“Bring your A-Game”

“The Game of basketball” “This is the National Football League” –  We know the game. We understand the league, now get on with the rest of your comment/opinion.


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