Welcome to 2013! I’m happy you made it but PLEASE don’t read into it. Nothing bothers me more than those elaborate 2012 reviews that casually ignore significant sports stories like Lebron James being unclutch, to Lebron the champion, to Lebron putting up 30-9-7 and no one is shocked. They always seem to miss how bountygate became a story about Commissioner Roger Goodell’s suspensions and Saints brass seems to have gotten a total pass about the bounty system THEY started and were warned about by…the Commissioner’s office. Oh and how about the Associated Press’ Male Athlete of the Year being Michael Phelps; I understand the temptation to give it to an Olympian but to not give it to Usain Bolt is pretty egregious (USA bias?). All of those things are best left to professionals. I can only offer you two of my favorite things: the 2012 Commissioner of the Year award and an updated assessment of the ALL Sports Defensive Team.
2012 Commish of the Year
It’s been a busy year for the fearless leaders of the Big Four professional sports leagues in North America. I give the Commissioner of the Year honor out to recognize the best of the most hated people in sports. No one gives people greater angst than Tim Tebow professional sports commissioners but we should always stop and realize that they do oversee the things we love despite the fact that fans think they could do a better job with greater ease. It should also be noted that you (yes YOU) probably cannot come close to doing their jobs because they work for the owners and you hate the owners.
This year was much harder than last year because lockouts really helped to cut down the pool by two people. 2011 saw Alan Selig storm to victory late in the year past Gary Bettman (gasp!) primarily because Selig and the MLBPA peacefully sat down and passed a collective bargaining agreement which got no media attentions because it wasn’t confrontational. Furthermore, the deal that passed made the game more entertaining with the added wild card play in game. Yes, instant replay is a problem and yes MLB does have the strongest players union but credit goes to the guy who provided stability and excellent playoff baseball to the views.
With that said, the final standings are:
4) Gary Bettman
Locked out again after an amazing hockey run. Any bit of momentum created by this league is thrown away with an ease second only to the XFL. No one respect Bettman and players have a viable alternative to hockey (though not viable in the long term). Bettman does seem to do a good job with owners as not playing is more cost effective than playing but fielding no product is just not good enough.
3) Roger Goodell (2010 Winner)
For all my issues with how Bountygate has been misled it still has been a black eye on the commissioner’s office. Anyone that does Adderall is apparently exempt from punishment for cheating because it’s not like football has a steroids issue. (Seriously have you seen these players?! Don’t bother me about steroids in baseball if the NFL is loaded with muscular freaks) Oh the replacement referee debacle all falls on him and although ratings did not suffer, it’s never good business to allow less than your best to be on display.
2) Alan Selig
Not much to report other than baseball STILL has not adopted instant replay because old man Selig is old. The changes to the playoff format, while great, were rushed through leaving glaring holes on what to do (re: one-game playoff rosters allowing for expanded slots for more pitching changes than Tony La Russa could think of). Not a bad season just not good enough for high honors.
1) David Stern
Started the NBA season better than anyone could’ve imagined. For all his shortcomings (namely his world class personality), he totally embraced the bad guy role this year. Check out the beginning of the NBA draft amid a healthy set of boos. “Woah…thank you for that warm welcome…” and the hand to the ear at the :49 second mark is stuff of pure gold. Great season after a rough start in the lockout era and most importantly pushed through his grand idea of a “World Cup of Basketball.” Congrats on this awards and announcing his retirement.
ALL II Defensive Squad Update
As many of you know, I defend a ton of people for pretty good reasons. Often times these people get no credit or respect because their narrative is totally miscast by the broader media/fans. Can’t pull a fast one by me. It’s time to update the defensive team by sport: who’s in, who’s out, and a brief (I promise) explanation how we got here.
The National Basketball Association Wing (aka The Dirk Wing)
CURRENTLY IN: Russell Westbrook, Vinny Del Negro, Carmelo Anthony, Deron Williams (Suspended for sucking)
OUT: Chris Bosh, Erik Spolestra
Won a title and Bosh’s absence made things much harder for Los Heat to do it. Value on display. Second best player that playoffs for the Heat. Spo won the chip and revolutionized line ups.
In: Mike Brown, my father Avery Johnson, Brook Lopez
Brown: Fired after five games without getting his entire healthy team on the court. Kobe wanted the Princeton Offense. Can’t fix being old as s**t.
Johnson: Won coach of the month the same day he was axed. In the mist of a bad run led by an injured Lopez and career low shooting from Williams. Got kiss of death from Williams. Honestly a .500 team on pace to finish above .500 (by a game but still).
Lopez: underappreciated as an offensive force. Team loses when injured. Team wins when healthy. Needs to get totally healthy but team is undeniably better when he is active and on the court.
The Major League Baseball Wing (aka Playing without Steroids Wing)
CURRENT: Ichiro, Carl Crawford
CHIKA CAN NEVER TALK ABOUT BASEBALL AGAIN AFTER ICHIRO’s PLATOON SPLITS WITH THE YANKEES LOOKED GREAT.
OUT: n/a
IN: Mike Scioscia, Justin Upton, Mike Trout
Scioscia is going to be under extreme pressure to win immediately after their loaded line-up missed the playoffs last year. Smart manager. Proven winner. Thin ice.
Upton is the cause of great concern with his numbers regressing last season. Many outlets are reporting that Arizona is looking to deal him (again) after signing Cody Ross. Still like the talent that is in Upton; pure athlete that can put it together for a solid career though a jump to the American League may stunt that growth.
Trout should’ve won the MVP by MILES. Best all-around player. People don’t understand that defense is part of the game. Do better.
The National Football Association Wing (aka Nate Kaeding Wing)
CURRENT: Alex Smith, Roger Goodell, Anthony “Tony” Romo, Joe Flacco
OUT: Pete Carroll, Steven Jackson, Reggie Bush
IN: Mark Sanchez
Romo is easily a top ten quarterback. Over his career he consistently throws for 4300-4600 yards completing 65% of his passes with a 2:1 TD/INT ratio. Yes he makes some poor decisions in huge moments but it’s not like his defense is helping him. Winning late to make it into playoff contention should also mean something. If Dallas thinks jettisoning Romo is going to make them better then they are bound to fail for the next five years.
Sanchez plays with no one talented. Get that man a talented person at a skill position and then bother me. (He is also here for comedic relief)
SO thats it. Expect me to rant about how no one will be admitted in the Hall of Fame and I will reveal my clear cut NFL MVP which I declared in week 14.
ALL II